Blog Every Day in May - Blog 23 - Compliments

Image courtesy of Michal Marcol / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I used to be terrible with compliments, I'd blush and brush them off, so I'm genuinely surprised I ever got any. I'm now a little better, I still find them a bit uncomfortable sometimes, but have at least learned to accept them graciously.

Most compliments nowadays are along the, "I like your shoes", or "your dress is cheering the office up today" lines. I get compliments from my husband, often when I'm feeling pretty rough and clearly need a confidence boost, and often retort that he only thinks that as he's partially sighted. I've still clearly not completely got the concept of accepting compliments graciously!

The best compliment I've ever received was in my first professional job. I'm not sure how it came up, but I remember the whole team sitting round in a meeting room. I guess we'd each been asked who the cleverest person we knew was. I can't even remember who I picked. I was however gobsmacked when another member of the team mentioned my name. Now, I'm fairly smart and switched on and good at my job, but I did horrendously at my A levels, and got an unimpressive degree from an even less impressive institution. The idea of me being the cleverest person anyone knew was literally beyond my comprehension. This was back in the days when I didn't know how to accept a compliment, so I think my response was to laugh and say they clearly didn't know many people; not very gracious. It was only when another member of the team waded in in back up, saying they thought the same, that I realised I'd probably been incredibly flippant and rude and apologised profusely. It probably taught me not to be so flippant with compliments, but I'm still not quite sure how they came to their decision!

Blog Every Day in May - Blog 22 - 13 Year Old Me

If I could speak to my 13 year old self, what would I tell her? I guess it would go a little something like this:

• You're not half as spotty, chubby or unattractive as you think you are, really don't worry about it. Oh, and smile, honestly, your teeth are fine. That said, if you'd like to get a brace, do it sooner rather than later if it will help your confidence.
• Don't worry about being shy, you'll come out of your shell when you need to.
• Curly or wavy hair may look good, but it's not for you. Avoid the perm lotion, your hair will be back to poker straight within a week, unless it's left on for so long that bits of your hair break off.
• Learn to study. I know it's boring and it's a technique that needs developing, but it'll be worth it not to break your heart over your A level results.
• Similarly, there will be other football World Cups. The year of your A levels is not the right time to be watching all the matches, even if Steve Bull has made the England squad.
• You'll make a few good friends in your life. No-one is universally popular, so don't let it get to you if sometimes you feel like Billy No Mates.
• If you go for a dog walk with a friend, stand well back when she's throwing sticks for the sake of your nose.
• Older men, not a great idea. Certainly avoid anyone with whom you have a sixteen year age gap, it's not worth the pain.
• Have courage in your convictions, when your gut feel tells you it's time to leave a job, it is, whatever people may say.
• When you're buying a house, just check it's locality, like whether it's right next to a motorway for example.
• Drink more squash, eat more fibre and less chocolate and exercise more. It'll be worth it in the long run.

Basically, I know that you're a stress-head and overthink everything, but try not to sweat the small stuff, everything always works out okay in the end.

This is thirteen year old me, not sure why I'm gurning, obviously bored of waiting for my photo to be taken. Oh, and Cath, if you ever find this blog, apologies for dragging you into this, but this was the only photo I could find without going into the loft!

Blog Every Day in May - Blog 21 - Dream Job

Image courtesy of  Rosen Georgiev / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

 I don't really know what my career aspirations were when I was younger, but think I wanted to be a nurse or a private detective at one stage. I've always wanted to be a singer, as I love music, but would only do so if I thought I could get away without intervention from the auto tune machine. How I ended up as an accountant is anyone's guess.

What I really want to do, is work in a wedding dress shop. Well, knowing me, I'd probably like to own my own wedding dress shop.

This was a little world that was alien to me until about five years ago, but they can be wonderful little places. I'm thinking here more about the owner managed stores than the large chains, one visit to Pronuptia was enough. I went to a number of shops, but eventually got my dress from a small shop in a nearby town. All of the staff were lovely and friendly and made me feel really welcome and comfortable, which is important when you're standing around in your underwear being squeezed into a dress a size too small! Nothing felt like too much trouble and it felt like they were really interested in me, rather than me just being another customer.

What appeals to me is that all the customers are keenly looking for their dream dress, so on the whole you have a store of excited, happy customers. Your aim as a wedding dress employee is to find the perfect dress for them, whether or not it's the one they have in their mind, and hope you have it in a size you can fit them into well enough for them to get the idea. Although I went for a straight dress, I did try on a meringue at one point, encouraged by the shop staff. I have to admit it looked so much better than I'd expected, and if I hadn't been getting married at the top of a narrow staircase I'd definitely have considered it.

I'd imagine it's really rewarding, knowing that you've helped a bride find the perfect dress for her, so she can be confident on her wedding day. Much more rewarding than signing off an audit file!

Blog Every Day in May - Blog 20 - Newsflash

Image courtesy of artur84 / FreeDigitalPhotos.net

I'm a day behind with this post and the leading national news stories today are really too depressing to comment on, when I've had a bad enough week myself. I thought instead I'd comment in the leading story on our local newspaper, the Bristol Post.

Residents' Parking Zones seem to be taking up the front page. This is due to our recently elected Mayor deciding that Residents' Parking Zones should be rolled out across central Bristol and surrounding areas in an attempt to cut down on congestion. The aim is to introduce these schemes in a phased rolling programme by September 2014. The affected area would be vast, as you can see on the map here. This would mean that to park on previously uncontrolled streets in these areas during the working day, you would need a permit, or pay and display if such facilities are available.

I live outside the area to be targeted, but there were attempts to introduce a Residents' Parking Zone on our estate a couple of years ago. All residents were invited to vote for or against the scheme, with the idea that it would be implemented only in roads where the majority of residents voted in favour. As it turned out only one road met the criteria, so in an estate of around 600 houses, only one road of fifteen houses has a permit scheme. It goes to show that it's not necessarily a popular move.

The proposed scheme would allow up to three permits per house, the suggested annual costs are £48 for the first car, £96 for the second and £192 for the third, with higher costs for businesses. It's clear to see why the council is keen on this idea. In areas where commuters grab every available on street space and residents are unable to park outside their homes during the day, I can see the appeal. However, there are already murmurs coming from areas which don't have a problem with commuter parking, where residents will see no benefit from the additional cost. Households would also be given fifty visitors permits a year to allow friends or tradesmen to park in their zone, but there are rumours that these permits are being sold in areas where the scheme has already been rolled out, or residents are unwilling to give visitors' permits to workmen. It's hardly practical for your plumber to turn up on the bus with the equipment he needs to do whatever work you've asked him to do.

That brings me to my greatest concern with this scheme. We don't live in London, this is Bristol. Our public transport provision is expensive and unreliable. That is exactly why people commute using their cars. I think in this area the Mayor is running before he can walk. The first step should be to improve the public transport system into the city centre from outlying areas, then attempts can be made to dissuade people from driving into the city centre. Until then, my concern is that these anti-car schemes will do no more than stopping people from wanting to work in the city centre as it becomes more expensive and less convenient to do so. Whether this would then drive businesses out of the centre and into industrial or business estates on the outskirts, only time will tell.

Blog Every Day in May - Blog 19 - Favourite Tradition

I found this a really challenging subject. National holidays / celebrations immediately sprung to mind, but I've been a bit blase about Halloween since I turned ten, we don't really do Valentines' Day, Shrove Tuesday is good but nothing to shout about and as for Christmas... Last year we didn't even put our tree up. I wanted to do it in early December, but didn't and by the next time we thought about it, it didn't seem worth it. We made do with a little eight inch high tree on a coffee table.

I guess then there are British traditions. One of my friends lives in a town where there is an annual folk festival. I love a good wander round, taking a few photos of the Morris dancers (a prime example below!), but I wouldn't say it was my favourite tradition, any more than fish and chips at the seaside. I have fond memories of country dancing and maypole dancing at school, although you can bet I didn't have fond feelings about it at the time. I can't imagine many schools do such things any more. Whilst I'd love to live in a traditional village which had a summer fete and such things were practised, again I don't think they're my favourites.

That brings me to thinking about the traditions we create ourselves, daft things like we always have a second Christmas dinner for New Year, we have our own way of serving up fajitas and have curry the night before we get the ligatures changed on our braces. I'm sure there must be more. I guess that's what I love; these little traditions that are specific to us.

Blog Every Day in May - Blog 18 - Best Friends

I've lost my momentum with these posts a little after the issues I had uploading Friday's post As a result, I've got three to catch up on.

Ever since I met my husband I've been telling him he's my best friend. He wrinkles up his nose in distaste, probably thinking that best friends are things that are best left to teenage girls. Over the years he's softened a little and I think now accepts the fact.

It's not that I don't have other friends. It's just that at the age I'm at, people drift apart, whether it's due to fallings out, relocations, getting married, having children... Suddenly your friends' priorities and time availability don't match yours, or they'd just rather spend their free time with their family rather than friends. Despite these occurences, I'm lucky to have a few good friends, who I think if everything fell apart would drop work / their day with the family / hit the motorway to check up on me.

I think that brings me to why my husband's my best friend. He knows me better than anyone else does, and still likes me. We both like to play the fool and laugh until bladder control is almost compromised. We're smart enough to understand each other and discuss anything from accounting standards (yawn!) to IT issues (well, I try). We generally get on very well and might have a big argument once a year, the rest of the time we've learned to compromise or walk away and let things calm down. We have similar priorities in life and just genuinely enjoy each others' company. What more could you ask for?

It's hard to get a good picture of us, we love a bit of face pulling.

Often I try but it's not until I see the photos that I realise I was the only one.

This was at the IMAX, but still, we laughed until we cried when we put on these glasses.

It'd be rude to go to a gift shop and not try on the merchandise.

New cycling glasses? Why not try an Ali G impression.

Ah, boys and their toys!

We put the face pulling on hold for our wedding day.

And I tried for a photo session, but got the giggles.

Seriously, who else would put up with us?!

Blog Every Day in May - Blog 17 - Walk to Work

I live about five miles from work, the drive in takes me about twenty to thirty minutes depending on traffic, followed by a five minute walk from the car park. After trying various routes over the years, I think I've now found the optimum journey into work, opting for back streets rather than a blast down the motorway. My route takes me through a nearby town with a private school and parents causing chaos by parking on double yellow lines, under a motorway, along one a notorious street (Google it and you'll see claims that it's the most dangerous road in Britain) and then into the city centre.

I took a few photos on my way in (the car ones when I was stopped) to share my journey.

Traffic starting to queue back due to parents dropping their little darlings off at school

At least now I have a nice view of our local church

Heading past the mosque and onto the most dangerous road in Britain; it looks quite peaceful

Into the city centre and outside the building I used to work in

Car parked and now on foot, taking a glance down Welsh Back

Pausing on Bristol Bridge whilst I wait for the pedestrian crossing

A quick look down the cut on the other side of Bristol Bridge

A look back over Castle Green

Getting closer now

Outside my work building

Waiting for the lift

On my way to the top of the building to start work

Today was a very dull trip in, with nothing exciting to photograph or comment on, but at least it wasn't raining. The photographs above, taken in rush hour, do make me query whether Bristol really is the second most congested city in the UK as a recent survey reported. I think my journey's really quite stress free!